Overcoming Procrastination: How to Move Through Resistance and Get to Work​

John: You’re listening to The Present Professional, where we explore the intersections of personal and professional development. To change your experience of life and work with every episode.

Tony: So tune in, grab your notebook, and let’s go. Let’s go.

John: Welcome to another episode of The Present Professional. Today, we’re here to talk to you about overcoming resistance. So procrastination is something that I’ve lived with for my whole life. I’m not sure exactly its origin. You know, we’ll talk a little bit about some of the ways that it shows up and why psychologically, but you know, those things in your high school yearbook that was, you know, rated, you know, most, most likely to this, most this, most that, I think we called them like senior superlatives or something in our senior yearbook. And I was actually rated biggest procrastinator. That’s the one that I, that’s the one that I got. And, um, yeah, literally it was known for turning in the project at the last minute. Like there’s something about coming up to the deadline that just lights a fire under me that helps me do my best work in the shortest amount of time. And, you know, when that becomes a problem is when there’s something without deadlines, right? When there’s something that I’m trying to build, when I have to set my own deadlines and meet them, it’s easier to be able to push that back. So that was one of the biggest battles of entrepreneurship with me was, you know, setting my own deadlines and meeting them. But in this episode, we’re going to talk about procrastination, why that resistance shows up to do your work, you know, in early to do your work when you can pace yourself and return back to the work. And there are some upsides to procrastination and slowing down, you know, and some some downsides. But it’s about managing the way that you’re going to approach your work to get your best work done. Right. So you can realize your potential and the world can realize what you want to create. So we’re going to be unpacking that today. So thanks for joining us.

Tony: Yeah. And, um, it’s funny, like the opposite of that, John gave me a great piece of feedback before we started and said that, um, uh, I think you kind of said I’ve mastered discipline or a master of discipline or something like along those lines. And I don’t know if that’s true, but I will say that from the opposite standpoint, if you ask people that knew me in high school, they would say that I’m the same that I am today, probably more like 10x that, but I had that in high school too. And actually, I don’t know if it was inherent. I think if I probably look at my family or something, or my dad specifically, yes. But aside from that, I think that it really was me being forced to lead in certain spaces and places. And so in high school, I was a part of this organization called the Gents. And it was almost like a high school fraternity to an extent. I was thrust into leadership quickly and I’ll tell this story to a friend we were talking, it’s like when you’re in high school and you have to stand at the front of a meeting and you know have a microphone or have the podium or whatever and you have to address 30 of your peers that are male, you better say what you gotta say because they will rank on you. They will make jokes about you. They will throw tomatoes. They will make you feel bad. And not in a really attempting to make you feel a bad way, but it’s just kids and young kids are just immature. Yeah, it’s just normal, you know, like boo, you know, stuff like that. So I had to learn quickly to say what I meant and mean what I say. And really, it turned me into a very young leader and all of them followed me. And, you know, I had a great time of doing that. And it really started in my sophomore year of high school, transitioning to junior year, where I was a leader again, or a leader for the first time. And then senior year, I was leading as well in a couple ways. And so that actually helped me kind of just be like that. And I think that it’s turned me, or not turned me, I think that it does have a trade off of me sometimes being a little rigid, you know, but it’s just who I have become, who I am. It’s not the worst thing, you know, having that discipline, but I know that some people probably like, man, like he’s just always like the same.

You get it done. Yeah, I do. I do. And if I don’t, if I, if I can’t get it done, what I’ve really learned is how to communicate that and tell you why I can’t and, you know, try to make it up in another way. But I also will tell you that I can’t do something as well, but. That’s me, man, and it’s funny that you said the opposite. I would definitely not have thought that, that you would have been voted the biggest procrastinator in your class. That’s hilarious.

John: Right. Do you remember the Integrity article that we read? I think it was in one of our team meetings with the Millennial community. You know, I think what you’re talking about there is integrity, you know, saying, you know, being a man of your word, you’re going to follow up when you’re going to get your work done. And if it’s not going to be done for that time, you’re going to still be a man of your word and let them know it’s not going to be done at that time. And here’s why. And here’s how it may have impacted you and what you can do to mitigate that. So for sure. To me, that’s all about integrity.

And the one thing that I want to bring up about that and you is, you know, when when we were talking about this episode, I said that I was like, this is going to be a great polarity here, you know, being voted biggest procrastinator and then Tony being, you know, the guy gets things done. And I wouldn’t classify you as rigid. Anyway, I’d say that you you stick to you stick to your vision and I think you’re still you know maybe you’ve developed this over your life, but I feel like you’ve since I’ve known you’ve always had a open mind, like open to new perspectives yet at the same time you know what your mission is, kind of like what we talked about on the last episode of understanding what opinions to take on and not. I think you’re a really good filter in that way. Like not easily swayed from your from your path, which I think is fantastic.

Tony: I’m sure not easily swayed. For better or for worse. Thank you.

John: You’re welcome. And for those of you out there that are huge procrastinators like me, this episode’s for us so we can learn so we can learn from Tony and what he does to stay on track and on. On that front, one of the books that made me feel so seen and like almost attacked was so seen was, uh, Stephen Pressfield’s War of Art—not Art of War, War of Art—so just to get to get that, keep that clear for everyone. And it’s all about how resistance shows up. And what procrastination is, is really resisting the task at hand. And it can show up in so many nefarious ways. And I’ll give you a few that show up for me, and I know that these are gonna resonate with some of my, all my procrastinators out there.

So one of the main things that comes up for me is doing other productive things or other things that feel productive. So whenever I have to sit down to write something, that’s usually the thing that I procrastinate the most is writing, writing an article, writing a new post, writing website content, anything around that. And you know, then I’ll sit down to write and I’ll be like, you know what? I need to clear my mind to write. Let me just clean and organize my entire office. Let me just, I’ll get out all the cleaning products, my desk. Yeah, I’ll be able to think better. My desk is clean, all this. I’ll do all this productive work. Yet at the same time when it comes down to it, that’s just making me feel better than what I’m perceiving how this article is going to be received. Right?

So it’s more about like the fear of how of how putting our work out there, of letting it be seen. It’s almost like the procrastination is saving me from the potential feeling of releasing that article and it being not received well or rejected. I think it really comes down to these deep subconscious fears and beliefs. So that’s one for me. Another one is, you know, going to the fridge to see what’s in there that wasn’t in there 10 minutes ago. Great, great perks of working from home and procrastination. Your phone, forget about it. If I’m going to get anything done, especially when it comes to writing, I put my phone in my safe. Not just downstairs, like literally behind a code.

And because there are so many things, like you talk about procrastination. I mean, these are, there are so many distractions and things that can pull us in different directions when it comes to, to our phone. And that’s a big thing. Like this is a war over your attention. So, when you can take control of your attention, you can start directing that energy into the ways that will move your life forward. So, I think I’ve talked about the blog on procrastination before and what it looks like inside a procrastinator’s mind, but I’m going to go through it really quickly here.

So we’ve jumped from just tracking on where I’m at. We went from The War of Art now to this, this, this, another blog article that talks about the procrastinator’s mind. And then I’m going to circle back to The War of Art. Okay. Just so we’re tracking. Now the procrastinator’s mind, there’s the rational decision maker, right, that, you know, has goals and dreams and wants to pursue something higher than himself that’s at the wheel, you know, and you want him to take the wheel to drive. And then, you know, you sit down to really start doing the work or you even think about sitting down to do the work and then, boom, the instant gratification monkey comes in, pushes the rational decision maker out of the way and whips the wheel. And that’s whipping the wheel over to the fridge, whipping the wheel over to YouTube or Wikipedia to go down rabbit holes. It’s like nonstop instant gratification monkey.

But then whenever the deadline approaches, that’s when the panic monster comes. And the panic monster is the only thing that can scare away the instant gratification monkey. So the deadline approaches, panic monster comes in, shoes away the instant gratification monkey, and you get the work done feverishly and with vigor, you get the work done. And I’m going to put the, uh, I’m going to put the link to that blog article in the, in the show notes as well. And I’m blanking on the author right now, but we are giving him, we are going to give him credit. And and put that in the show notes for you guys because it’s a wonderful story. It’s also a TED Talk that he did as well. So I’m, we’ll put that all in the show notes, but it is so clear about the battle that’s been going on in my mind for my whole life and, you know, there’s—then circling back to The War of Art. It helped me see the nefarious ways that the instant gratification monkey shows up for me.

And some quotes from that book that I want to bring up. So one of them is, most of us have two lives, the life we live and the unlived life within us. So what the rational decision maker is trying to do is realize that unlived life within us. And the instant gratification monkey is really just trying to live the life we have right now and experience pleasure and fun right now. Right. And now, you know, I want to hear from Tony some of the ways that, you know, you keep your rational decision maker at the helm and, you know, stay focused when all the distractions of life come up and, I mean, I’m sure you have even more going on now with your family and everything. So help us out, Tony.

Tony: Wow, yeah, no pressure, right? You know, yeah, I think that part of it is, or the biggest part of it is really just sacrifice. So I made a joke last night to Crystal. I don’t know if I’ll use this, but I said, I was like, do you ever wish sometimes you were with like those people that are always dancing on TikTok and Instagram, like the people that are always going viral for dancing? She’s like, no. And I’m like, I’m just saying, because I brought that up to say, like, I’m completely opposite of that, right? Like, I would never.

But I brought that up because it’s sacrifice, right? Like, the sacrifice for me is that, you know, sometimes I do sacrifice, I guess, some of the more fun things, or what’s perceived to be fun. I have fun in my own way, but sacrifice is the number one piece of discipline, I think. Like really locking in on what matters and what doesn’t matter and kind of being a little binary about it. I think meeting people that I’ve met in my life, some mentors, some just people in general, they’ll tell you that they don’t watch a lot of TV. You know, they don’t know the latest thing. They don’t know the latest thing, the latest show or the latest score update from, you know, sports. They know their industry, right? They know the latest thing that’s relative to what pays them, what keeps the lights on, and what kind of keeps their family going forward. And so I think adopting that early has helped me.

Now, I can tell you all about the NBA. That’s my thing, right? I love basketball. I can moderately talk about football and I can tell you a little bit about the Astros, but that’s just what I’ve accepted and embraced. I haven’t tried to become more than I am in those regards. I will definitely go to a live sports game and enjoy it as just like a comedy show or a good movie. So, you know, I do have fun, but I think it’s how I use my time. It’s just a little bit different. And I think accepting that and embracing that and not being, uh, kind of like trying to keep up with everything, because it’s like you mentioned, it’s a lot of distractions, like so many today, so many, you know, like you mentioned, war on our—for our—attention, you know. I think that we are hugely distracted, so if you can just mitigate that and say, you know what, what if I just take all of it off the table and then choose what I’m gonna allow myself to be distracted with? I think that’s a big part of it.

But it’s way deeper than that. Like you mentioned, just going to the fridge or saying I need to clean my desk or before I start a task, I need to do this or I need to do that. It’s really about a few different things. Talking about what gets in the way is important too. So a few of the things that gets in the way of you getting things done generally is motivation. The second one is priorities. The third could be insufficient resources. A fourth is unforeseen obstacles. And five could just be a communication issue with you and maybe other people that are involved in it. And that’s just coming from the book Conscious Accountability. I’ve been reading that one here lately, and I think it’s important. It kind of coincides with The Present Professional a bit.

But for me, I think that I have plans that I set and then I try to work backwards on them. I have goals and I have them written down. I have them on my phone. I have them on a few different notebooks. And I just keep it simple, man. I just try to walk them down, like walk down every goal that I set. And I even, for years, I’ve been doing it in bite-size formats. And then if I’m not able to get it done in the time that I initially set or hoped for, I don’t let that fluster me, I’ll just roll it into the next season and then hope to get it done in the next season and roll it into the season after that. But I think it’s all about taking action, doing things, not being afraid of failure, because there’s a great quote from Charles Duhigg, and he says that the difference between who you are and who you want to be is what you do. And I’m like, that is so true, because who you are and who you want to be, that’s one piece of the pie. If it was a pie chart and it was broken into a third, who you want to be is a third, who you are is a third, and then what you do is the other third. And so what you do with your time is the biggest piece of it all when it comes to discipline, as well as what I mentioned in the beginning, which is sacrifice.

John: Yeah, I always say something like behave like who you want to become. And I think that’s very much in line with what you do. You know, are your habits reflecting the future that you want to create? And, you know, I’d say that, you know, this is a constant battle for me, man. I get, uh, very much pulled into the present moment and, you know, wanting to be a part of something, wanting to be a part of the moment and, you know, having, you know, dealing with, I’d say, you know, early in my career, mid twenties or so, like the fear of missing out was so huge for me. Like I didn’t miss anything.

And like, if you want to create anything great, I’m just going to be straight up. Like you, you have to be a little bit more boring. You just have to be. Mm hmm. And that’s actually from, um, that’s one of one of the tips in, uh, what is the book called? Steal Like an Artist. So great. It’s about like how nothing, not how nothing is original, but the way that you can combine patterns and the things that you’re doing in your life to create works of art, but also to do the work, right. And part of that is, you know, not just not having a boring life, but you have to say no to some things to say yes to what matters to you. Right?

So that’s been, that’s been a big fight for me as well as what to say no to, because then what comes up for me is, you know, when I say no to things, you know, what do people think about that? And like that’s come back to every problem being an interpersonal problem, really at the root of it. It, for me, comes down to what are others going to think of that? You know, am I going to be invited next time? Like things like that. So, you know, so I’d say that, you know, for a lot of my procrastinators out there, you know, releasing the fear of being disliked is going to be a huge part of overcoming that fear of missing out and doing your work. Right.

And another part of that is it means something to us. So another quote from The War of Art is if it meant nothing to us, there’d be no resistance. And this is true. Like the things that we procrastinate about are important. You know, they are things that we think are going to set us apart, that we think are going to grow us into a new sphere of personal and professional development, just that are really going to uplevel our lives and and our contributions. And, you know, because we care about them so much, the fear of the result or how that work is going to be received gets higher.

So what we can actually do is help not make the impact smaller, but really release what people are going to think and how it’s going to be received. Because another thing from Steal Like an Artist, I think it’s actually the first tenet from the book, is do good work and share it with people. Not, not do good work that ensures it has an impact on people. Just do good work and share it with people. You know, it might be received well by one person out of the hundred people that see it. And maybe you made a difference for that one person. Maybe that one person passes your work on to the right person that gets it to the right audience. That’s going to take 70% of the people are going to want it and they’re going to benefit from it. There are so many different ways that your work can get out there, but it starts by you just doing the damn thing. Right?

So release, when you start releasing some of that, the significance that you have built up around what you’re creating and like, let it mean less about what it means about you. So it’s like whenever I think something means a lot about me or my reputation or, you know, how it’s going to be seen. So many people are going to see it. It’s going to affect the, you know, the reputation or the, how my business is being seen. All of that buildup makes resistance rear its head. Like, oh, my mind will find anything to reach for something instant gratification, to reach for something that feels good right now, or even that feels important right now, right? That feels like I’m contributing to something or being productive, you know? So for me, it’s also like trying to temper the pedestal that I’m putting the project on.

Tony: Giving it too much weight, giving it too much authority. You know, and one thing that we haven’t talked about, and I think it’s important because I actually use this principle, even though it doesn’t sound like I would, is have fun. Have fun with it. Seriously. Like, you know, some things are fun. Some things are sports. Some things are a game. Everything isn’t. But I try to treat some things like a game. Or not a game, but like it’s sport.

So a week ago, I think, yeah, about a week ago—or, let me not timestamp it, I’ll just say recently—I did a two-hour talk at a national conference. It was here in Houston, but it was a national conference. And once I finished, and I was tired, but when I finished, someone came up to me and was like, man, you did really good. That was really good. And I just told him, first words out of my mouth, I was like, this is my sport. This is what I enjoy doing. This is what I love to do. So when you approach your industry or your passions like that, then it makes the hard work, which is practice or preparation, it makes that a little more purposeful. Because that part is the stuff we don’t like to do. We naturally don’t like, I quit playing football because I didn’t like practice. I didn’t quit playing football because I didn’t like the game or I didn’t like the contact. I thought practice was dumb. I’m like, why am I in here? People breaking bones in practice. But yeah, that’s another story.

But I’m saying, you know, I treat, you know, the work that I get to do like sport. And so one of, probably, I haven’t talked about him in a while, but I always like to talk about him, Kobe Bryant, my favorite person of all time, shared the same birthday, Kobe. Like if you like, now now that he’s, he’s, he’s died, there’s so many stories about his work ethic and it’s like people are like sharing more and pulling out. You can look online—at least my timeline is filled with Kobe stories all the time. Point I’m making is that now you hear, you knew about his greatness, but now you really get to hear about his insane work ethic. And that’s something that I knew before he died. That’s why I was a huge fan, because I knew he was kind of like psycho when it comes to his preparation and stuff like that.

And, you know, that is a perfect example of, you know, you get the public declaration or the public recognition and all the success and glitz and glamour. But it’s the private dedication that actually makes the difference. It’s the grueling work. There are stories of Kobe Bryant in the gym at 2 a.m., 3 a.m., 4 a.m., 5 a.m. There are stories of him at the Olympics with the rest of the guys. They all go out and have a good time, and they’re walking back from the club or wherever they were, they’re walking back into the hotel or wherever they were and they see him in the gym. They’re coming back from partying and they see him at the gym. Think about that. You’re coming back to go to sleep. And this guy is at the gym already working out, drenched in sweat.

And so it’s like that kind of like mentality is something that I just naturally adopted over the years. I’m not like Kobe Bryant, like crazy or anything, but I’m just saying it’s a great example for me to see somebody who everybody loves, you know, he’s a top 10 player of all time and all these things people say about him. For me, it’s the work that he put in that is my biggest love and affinity for him as an athlete. Try to take into my own life is my preparation process and making sure that I’m doing my best at all times.

John: And I think you just, I think you just produced a breakthrough thought for me. It’s like not putting the result on the pedestal, but put the work on the pedestal.

Tony: Mm hmm.

John: Like glorify the work. Like, we can all glorify our work. Like, who cares about the result? Do the work. And like, how can we celebrate the fact that we’re doing the work? Man, now I’m like, now I’m like excited to work. You know, well, maybe we should just stop recording. I can just go build something right now.

Tony: And I’ll say, like, in that, like, for you or even anyone else that resonated with that like that, find a way to give yourself your own trophy as well, in the discipline process. Because nobody’s going to reward you for that. So I find my own ways to reward myself for that. If I did some super amazing project that nobody knows about but me, that’s fine. Then I might go and have a great lunch at a restaurant that just makes me happy, regardless of what, the time, the cost, if that’s what makes me happy. So I’m just saying, find your way to celebrate yourself as well. And don’t overdo it. Go to Paris every time they, you know, have a birthday or something. It’s like, damn, you just turned in one more year. And no offense to those type of people, but me, I’m like, and some of my friends and others too, I’m like, what are we celebrating? What are we celebrating? Like, and of course, celebrate your life. I’m not saying don’t, but I’m just saying like, find balance in your approach so that you can really open yourself up to where a trip to Paris is so normal and regular for you because of the work you did for 10 years of just grinding, you know?

John: Yeah. And, you know, I just want to plug this in that like, just be careful. Watch, watch when anything can become resistance. You know, you can do a little bit of work and then a lot of celebration. And you’re like, well, no, I’m, I’m celebrating the work on the, uh, that I’ve, that I’ve now put on this pedestal. And then like in the background, the monkey’s like, ha ha ha. Now we get to celebrate all the time, you know? So it’s like, it’s a constant, it’s a constant battle, but you got what it takes. We have what it takes. We can win The War of Art and it’s through little techniques like this, subtle mindset shifts. And the one thing that I’m taking away big time is, you know, celebrating the work is like finding little ways to make it more fun. Like let’s have fun and build something together. What do you think?

Tony: Yep, that’s it. That’s what it’s all about. Because nobody should be a bigger cheerleader for you than you. If you’re blessed to have a partner, girlfriend, boyfriend, spouse, they can sometimes come in and be that motivated driver for you. Especially if you’re down, right? But when you’re up, you better be celebrating yourself. You better know that I’m the best, right? I’m the best me. I’m doing my best work. Celebrate yourself and then take yourself out. Don’t expect people to always give you the trophy. Do it for yourself.

John: All right, my friends, thank you so much for being listeners. Rate us and review us anywhere that you’re listening right now. And check out more at thepresentprofessionalpodcast.com. We’d love to hear from you, love to interact with you. So please don’t hesitate with your feedback or any episode ideas as well. So take this out into your life, share it with someone you love, someone that you feel needs to hear this message right now, someone in your life. So share it, embody it, and go win The War of Art. Until next time.